Thingy, Fruit, and Bad Idea Don’t Answer

Working for a children’s magazine has lots of perks. As you can see, all that recipe testing is really paying off…

And I can post these pictures because I just got a fancy new (not-quite-smart, aka the dumbest one I could find) phone*, which was nonetheless smart enough to come with a cable that I can use to transfer photos from phone to computer. OK, I concede. That’s very smart.

*It’s not that I am opposed to smartphones. In fact, they are very useful. It’s just that I don’t think companies should completely stop making phones that just plain-old call people.

My new phone is not, however, smart enough to figure out how to import all my contacts from my old phone. And I am not smart enough to figure out how to use aforementioned cable to accomplish this. (Neither was the guy at the store, though. Which gives me hope. Because as he told me several times, emphatically, he’s a retired yacht captain, and I’m sure if I’d thought about it longer I would’ve figured out how that was relevant.)

Going through one’s 375 phone contacts, accumulated over the past four or five years, is a real walk down memory lane. Among my contacts, I have:

-contacts named David’s Robot, Joan Upstairs, No Name, Piano People, Joe Mojo, Kelly Much Ado, Thingy, Fruit, and Bad Idea Don’t Answer

-1 movie star, 1 national park, and 1 (but not The) Lucy Liu

-2 different places, in different states, called The Barn

-3 landlords

-4 theaters

-5 exes

-6 former violin students and a former piano student

-7 Couch Surfers

-at least one contact for every letter of the alphabet (yes, I know a Xiavian)

-someone named “Ditsy” and someone named “Dotsie” (both lively senior citizens)

-a friend I’ve known since first grade

-my fourth grade teacher

-diners, pharmacies, yoga studios, doctors, dentists, cab companies, electric companies, cable companies, grocery stores, bookstores, libraries, art museums, symphonies, and a vet

I take it all back. This phone isn’t smart–it’s brilliant. All I need now is the Queen’s number, and I can pretty much do anything. Guess I’ll have to go back to London…


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